184 lines
4.4 KiB
Markdown
Executable File
184 lines
4.4 KiB
Markdown
Executable File
#!/bin/env slides
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# Houseplants
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And how to keep them alive for 12 years.
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_by Bruce Hill_
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# My Houseplants
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I have a bunch spread across the apartment.
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This talk will walk you through some basics.
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# Buy a Plant
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- Go to Home Depot (good prices)
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- Trendy plant shops are overpriced (but have cute pots)
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- Read the labels on the plants for light conditions
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- Nice to have: a small watering can (~$2)
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# Easy Plants: Peace Lily
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- I've had mine for 12 years (!)
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- Low light
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- Very emotive
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- Pretty flowers sometimes
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# Side Note: Hot Fuzz
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> Yes, I’ve been tending my Peace Lily for three
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> years now. NASA rates it as one of top ten air
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> cleaning plants. It oxygenates the room, it
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> helps me think, it relieves stress. Its needs
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> are simple.
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# Easy Plants: Snake Plant
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- Low light
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- Needs good drainage
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- Tolerates infrequent/inconsistent watering
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- AKA "mother-in-law's tongue" lol
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- Can propagate with clippings
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# Easy Plants: Pothos
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- Jungle plant
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- Low light
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- Dangly (nice for putting on a bookshelf)
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- Tolerates overwatering well (rainforest mutation)
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- Easy to propagate
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# Easy Plants: Succulents
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- High light
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- Need good drainage
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- California vibes
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- Lots of variety
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- Weird alien plants
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# Drainage
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Most plants' roots will rot if left to sit in water.
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(Pothos and other rainforest plants are an exception)
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Ideally, you want damp soil, not standing water.
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Pots have drainage to solve this problem:
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- Little hole at the bottom to let excess water out
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- Catchment tray to catch the water
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- Unglazed clay pots are porous
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Plant pots are not buckets of dirt!
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You can put pots with drainage inside decorative pots,
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but don't forget to empty the water if it's coming out
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the bottom!
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# Watering Basics
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1. Poke your finger in the soil.
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2. If it's cold (wet), don't water. Damp soil is also darker.
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3. Slowly pour water on top of the soil.
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4. Wait a bit for it to settle (you can hear it)
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5. Be ready to dump out catchment tray if you poured too much.
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6. Ideal amount of water is a tiny bit coming out the bottom, or just shy.
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# Watering Tips
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- Very dry soil absorbs water **slower** than damp soil. For
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very dry plants, pour a little bit, wait, pour a bit more.
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- When water drains out the bottom, it clears out accumulated
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waste in the soil. Do this at least every once in a while.
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- For sensitive plants, leave water to sit for a few hours
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before watering so chlorine in the tap water evaporates.
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- Add a bit of fertilizer to the water every so often to
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provide essential nutrients.
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# (Re)potting
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Sometimes you want to move a plant to a new pot
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(e.g. if it's getting too big)
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- Go to a farmer's market and buy nice soil (Union Square)
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- Choose high/low drainage soil appropriately
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- Put plant in its old pot in the sink when dry
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- Dig your hands in and lift the plant out from the roots
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- Untangle the roots if they're too clumped up
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- Fill new pot with a bit of soil
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- Move plant into new pot and start packing in soil
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- Firmly tamp down the soil until it is a bit below the
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rim of the pot.
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- Water the plant and be prepared to add more soil as it settles
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-----------------------------------------
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# Grow Lights
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- Good for dark apartments
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- Get them at a hardware store
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- Grow bulb (~$10)
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- Clamp lamp fixture (~$15)
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- Timer (~$7)
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- Hook up to a timer
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- Plants are happy 😊
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- **Bonus:** wake up to artificial sunlight
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# Propagating
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- Plants want to grow and reproduce.
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- **Big Plant** wants to charge you money and keep you dependent.
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- Propagating lets you make more plants for free.
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- Different for each plant species.
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- Not that hard!
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1. Take clippings or sprouts
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2. Put in a cup or tray or bottle until they develop roots.
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3. Plant in soil.
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4. Profit!
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# Go Forth and Propagate!
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